An imagined conversation between my sole coworker and me

Me: Would you believe me if I told you there was a couch in the woman's restroom?
Coworker: No. Why would I?
Me: Because sometimes there are couches in there. Sometimes there are whole separate rooms leading into the bathroom with mirrors and couches and squishy chairs and plants.
Coworker: But this is an office. An office without a lot of money.
Me: Would you believe me if I told you Marion Berry was in there to give us towels when we're done washing our hands?
Coworker: Most certainly not.